


another day where i love you

by Ceta



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Fluff, Just a tinyyy bit of, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-21
Updated: 2017-09-21
Packaged: 2019-01-03 18:54:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12152736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ceta/pseuds/Ceta
Summary: "I didn't want to leave you," Victor said, unaware of the blush burning Yuuri's ears."O-Oh." Yuuri pressed his hand to his mouth, trailing behind Victor as he headed towards the exit, and looked skyward, prayed that it wasn't too obvious, the way he was utterly taken, heart and soul, by this startlingly honest man. "I'll try to stay awake, next time."Or; Victor and Yuuri love each other. That's it; that's all it's been, all it is, and all it'll ever be.





	another day where i love you

**Author's Note:**

> Worry not. Despite the angst tag it will be practically nonexistent. Probably. I dunno.

Victor loved Yuuri, loved him like how flowers adored the sun, basked in its light and bloomed because of it. Yuuri made Victor better, made him softer and kinder where he'd been sharp edges and scathing comments, made him feel bright and beautiful with each compliment he gifted Victor. He was wonderful, is wonderful, will always be wonderful. Yuuri was the sun in Victor's clouded skies, the light that kept him warm and alive, the one that Victor would always, always reach out to only to never be reached out to in return. Not out of malicious intent, but because Yuuri was so kind - too kind - and loved everyone indiscriminately.

Victor loved Yuuri, but Yuuri loved everyone, and how was Victor supposed to compete with that - with all the other people who yearned for Yuuri's attention and affection?

 

* * *

 

Here's the thing: He couldn't.

 

* * *

 

"Yu-u-ri!" Victor drawled out, teasing. He poked the crown of Yuuri's head, smiling even as Yuuri groaned and swatted his hand away. "Up! Up! Come on, Yuuri, I'm starving."

"I'm tired," Yuuri mumbled to the table, voice muffled. He did sound tired, and he hadn't looked any better when he walked in for class, either, but Victor needed to make sure Yuuri ate something. It was the least he could do when Yuuri stayed up all night finishing their project by himself because Victor had gone down with a terrible fever the day before. Yuuri shifted, pillowing his head in his arms more comfortably, and sighed. "Go without me, Victor."

"But - " Victor started, only to realize Yuuri fell asleep, face lax and mouth parted the slightest bit. Huffing a breath, Victor leaned his cheek on his forearm, arm propped up on Yuuri's desk, and poked Yuuri's cheek. Yuuri mumbled something incoherent under his breath and sighed. Victor pouted.

Yuuri was always like this, selfish and selfless all at once. He was like this when he pulled Victor out of his bubble of solitude only to avoid Victor weeks afterwards.

("I was embarrassed!" Yuuri had said into his hands, beyond embarrassed, when Victor brought it up to him, and he'd spent the weeks following doing everything he could to make it up to Victor by staying at his side).

He was like this when he refrained from telling Victor about the people talking behind his back and decided to take the matter into his own hands when he reached his breaking point.

("They were talking about you, Victor. I tried to ignore it, but when they talked about you like _that_ , I couldn't anymore," Yuuri had mumbled to him as Victor cleaned the scrapes and cuts littering Yuuri's face and knuckles. His eyes had been shining, though, shining with determination and satisfaction in equal measure. It was the first time Victor had ever seen Yuuri fight, and something like satisfaction welled up within him, too, because Yuuri was perfect.)

He was like this when Victor had been delirious with fever and miserable, all gentle coaxes and praises that made Victor's heart hurt, only to revert back to kind, kind Yuuri of everyday life, and Victor remembered that Yuuri was just like this, that Victor wasn't someone terribly special to him. It hurt, but only because Victor wasn't strong enough to keep himself from hoping like an idiot.

"Ah," someone said beside them, and Victor glanced up to see Hana, a girl from their next class, frowning at Victor's finger on Yuuri's cheek. "Did Yuuri fall asleep?"

Victor glanced down at the small pack in her hands, then back up to her eyes, which were stubbornly glued to where Victor was touching Yuuri. "Yes," Victor said, somewhat stiffly. He pasted a smile on his lips, though, because Yuuri always said he looked kinder when he did. "Did you need something? I can tell Yuuri when he wakes up."

Hana smiled, but it was a thin thing, flimsy. "No, it's fine," she said, taking a step away with a half-hearted wave. "I'll tell him when he wakes up. Thank you, though."

As she strode away, Victor stroked Yuuri's cheek almost absent-mindedly, relishing in this small moment where he could touch Yuuri with some semblance of intimacy. Victor didn't know when he wouldn't be able to do this anymore, to pretend for brief moments that he was Yuuri's and Yuuri was his, but it was a constant reminder in the forefront of his mind whenever the urge to get closer to Yuuri gnawed at him.

Victor was terrible at controlling his impulses, at any rate, given how far and gone he was for Yuuri. The fact was only solidified when Victor buried the tips of his fingers into Yuuri's hair and brushed away the bangs falling across his face. He glanced at the clock hanging by the window and sighed, pulling his hand away. About forty-five more minutes until their next class. Victor closed his eyes and let the soft murmurs around them pull him to sleep alongside Yuuri.

 

* * *

 

"Maybe you should watch where your going next time," Victor said, lips downturned. He was looking at the guy who bumped into him, the one who was picking up Victor's scattered notes and assignments with frantic haste. Victor recognized him, though only vaguely - Katsuki Yuuri, the business major with the blue glasses. He was famous around their campus and well-loved even by people who've only spoken to him once.

(Victor had thought, then, that he'd be the first to resist Yuuri's charms, that he wouldn't be able to get under Victor's skin - that Victor wouldn't _let_ him.

Needless to say, he'd been wrong.)

"I'm so sorry," Yuuri said, swiping the last of Victor's papers and presenting it to him with a flushed face. He wasn't demure by any means, standing straight as he gazed right into Victor's eyes - and maybe that was when Victor fell, staring back into bright eyes that glittered in the sunlight, concern clear as day. "Are you all right?"

"Fine," Victor said, and he fought the way his lips wanted to draw back, hating himself for giving in so easily. He wasn't like this. He didn't _want_ to be like this.

But no one had ever looked at him like Yuuri did, either, in open, genuine worry.

"Are you sure?" Yuuri asked as Victor took his papers and not-so-subtly shoved them back into his folder.

"I'm fine," Victor repeated. "I have to get to class. Bye."

Victor - he walked away from Katsuki Yuuri with hardly a glance back.

And Yuuri?

Yuuri didn't let him go.

 

* * *

 

"I think," Victor said, loud enough in the open courtyard to garner some curious glances from the students passing by, "you have a problem."

Yuuri flushed, but he stood his ground. "I made you fail your test."

That he did, Victor mused, though it wasn't as bitter as he wanted it to be, not after Yuuri had done everything he could to try and apologize to Victor when he'd found out from Chris, who turned out to be a mutual friend. After running into Yuuri, Victor had gotten to class late and was told to leave before he could even get a foot through the door. Embarrassment had been Victor's first reaction; he was a stellar student, and being turned away like that in front of classmates - that, he later admitted, didn't really matter - had been humiliating. Anger towards Katsuki Yuuri was the second, rising from the burn of shame in his gut as he held his head high and walked back to his dorm. Though as always, the emotions bled away, and Victor was left with apathy.

"It's fine," Victor stressed, pasting a smile on his lips. He could feel how the corners of it twitched and ached, unused to this mask, but Victor hadn't been able to drive Yuuri away with blank-faced reassurances, so it was time for an alternative. "It's not that big of a deal."

Then, to Victor's surprise, Yuuri's brows drew together and he frowned, looking at Victor with something hard in his gaze. "It is if you're smiling like that."

Starting, Victor opened his mouth to say something only for Yuuri to duck his face into one palm, the other hand waving frantically between them as if to erase the words away. "No, no- That came out wrong! I'm sorry! I meant that- that you don't usually smile, so it's- kind of obvious? That you're not telling the truth, I mean -- Not that you don't have a nice smile, you do! Definitely! It's just that- it's kind of..."

Victor, who'd felt the heat of embarrassment rise up the back of his neck throughout Yuuri's tirade, pressed his lips together, swallowed the rock in his throat. "Fake?"

Yuuri's frown deepened, and he looked to his feet. Victor wondered why his heart was pounding so terribly in his chest.

"I was going to say," Yuuri started carefully, looking back at Victor, who met his gaze as steadily as he could manage, "that it kind of looked like you've never smiled before."

Victor's eyes go half-closed as he pulled his lips into a wide smile that hurt his cheeks, and he hoped - desperately, terribly - that it would be enough to hide how they shined. "There hasn't been much to smile about."

Yuuri stayed silent for a moment, staring at Victor with something he couldn't recognize in his gaze. "How about we make a deal, then?" Yuuri asked, taking a step closer. "Let me give you something to smile about every day."

Victor frowned. "What do you get out of doing that?"

And maybe, Victor thought, maybe this was where it _really_ started, this thing between he and Yuuri, because Yuuri just looked at him with soft eyes filled with warmth and said:

"Your smile."

 

* * *

 

 

"Victor... Victor, wake up. We need to get to class soon."

Blinking his eyes open, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, Victor looked around until he found Yuuri's watching him with something he couldn't place in his gaze. He yawned, and Yuuri chuckled.

"I can see why you don't nap," Yuuri said, just on this side of teasing.

Victor pouted, flicked his bangs out of his eyes and turned away. "You wouldn't wake up," he said. "You looked so comfortable, too, so I just... "

"Fell asleep with me," Yuuri said, laughter shining in his eyes. He stood, handing Victor his backpack, and smiled as Victor took it with a quiet Thanks. "You could have left, you know. I wouldn't have minded."

"I didn't want to leave you," Victor said, unaware of the blush burning Yuuri's ears.

"O-Oh." Yuuri pressed his hand to his mouth, trailing behind Victor as he headed towards the exit, and looked skyward, prayed that it wasn't too obvious, the way he was utterly taken, heart and soul, by this startlingly honest man. "I'll try to stay awake, next time."

 

* * *

 

Yuuri started, amazingly enough, with this:

"Here," Yuuri said, handing him a slip of paper.

Victor stared at the perfect print written across it. _Thursday 6-8pm - MATH1426_ _Retake for Victor Nikiforov_. Underneath that was the head of the department's familiar, flowing signature. "This isn't how college works," Victor said, half in disbelief and half wondering if this was a prank. He looked at Yuuri, who had a small smile pulling at the corners of his lips. "Retakes are over. How did you...?"

"The head of the department - Okukawa - she's a family friend of mine. I explained what happened and asked if it you could retake the exam, and she said yes." Yuuri shrugged a bit, looking embarrassed. "They're not grading it until the weekend, anyway, so it's not that much of a hassle - especially since there are a couple of other students who are retaking it along with you. The exam schedule didn't work for them, I think, and neither did the actual retake."

Victor couldn't stop staring, and Yuuri shifted from foot to foot under his gaze, glancing at him with something in his eyes.

"You - " Victor started, only to cut himself off. He looked back down at the slip of paper, back up at Yuuri, and felt something shudder and unravel just the tiniest bit. "Thank you."

He smiled, the awkwardest twitch of his lips, inexperienced, unpracticed - but the way Yuuri beamed back at him made him feel like it was the most beautiful smile he'd ever made if it could be returned like that.

 

* * *

 

 

Yuuri tried to keep his eyes open, tried to focus, but his head tilted to the side, eyes going half-mast, and he knew then that he was going to fall asleep.

"I'll take notes," Victor murmured from beside him. He was smiling slightly, probably amused at how close he was to falling asleep not even twenty minutes into the lecture. "You stayed up all night; get some rest, Yuuri."

Orienting himself, forcing his eyes open, Yuuri whispered back, "It's fine. I can stay awake."

Victor looked at him from the corner of his eyes, his smile growing wider, making his eyes crinkle with mirth at the corners. One of his more genuine smiles, Yuuri learned, knew now, and he loved it, could stare at it for hours if Victor let him. "All right," he said and looked back to the front where their professor was going over something about proper communication. His acquiescence was too easy, but Yuuri bit down on the inside of his cheek and stared at the professor, catching every word that came out of his mouth, memorizing, storing it away somewhere in his head, _learning_ -

"Thanks," Yuuri mumbled after class, jotting down the notes Victor had taken earlier. Victor had woken him the moment class ended, his eyes soft and unguarded - a look reserved for Yuuri - and his hand on his shoulder gentle. Now, they were sitting outside on one of the benches sprinkled around campus, shaded by the large tree jutting out from behind them even though the sun was high and bright in the sky. "I didn't even realize I fell asleep."

Victor laughed, and for some reason - for every reason - it was him that Yuuri thought blinding.

He struggled to look away, but he managed to pin his gaze to the lead of his pencil, to the words forming, half consciously, on the lined paper beneath his palm. Victor was wonderful. He'd already established that when Yuuri almost made him fail his calculus class and still Victor didn't blame him, but it needed to be said once again: Victor was wonderful. A wonder of a man wrapped in thick skin and aching loneliness, and Yuuri wondered why, wondered _how_ , Victor was shrouded in shadows when he could shine brighter than the sun and stars.

Again, once more: Victor was wonderful, will always be wonderful, in Yuuri's eyes. He was kind, once he warmed up to Yuuri, his sharp tongue nothing more than an occasional tease rolling off it, a handful of innuendos to make Yuuri squirm, now; his touch gentle, his eyes kinder, his smile the one thing that sent Yuuri's heart fluttering dangerously in his chest, a _thumpthumpthump_ that only stopped once it tripped over a beat and started anew.

Victor was quick to become the axis of Yuuri's world, this hot-cold person who was only ever warm to him, now, like a pair of arms welcoming him home. Yuuri thanked every moment he spent with Victor that he had the guts to make that proposition to him, had had his anxiety blown over by something more steadfast and determined: the ache in his heart to make Victor smile, if only once.

Every day since, he'd made Victor smile, made him laugh, made him happy. Yuuri wanted it to last, this thing between them.

One final time, for the people in the back: Victor Nikiforov would never stop being wonderful.

Even when, in the future, he wasn't there by Yuuri's side anymore.


End file.
